- jonesy: it is pretty funny how eating food is like being on drugs for you.
- [2 days ago]
- me: I saw a friend from undergrad at the party, and he said it was a legit actual mustache
- jonesy: pics
- me: tomorrow maybe
- jonesy: just, a cropped pic of between the end of your nose to the top of your lip
- jonesy: with hashtag #mustacheupdate
- me: lol that would be a weird feature
- jonesy: but a pretty good joke
- jonesy: "this is exactly the area you should be paying attention to"
- jonesy: and then at the end of 3 months, make a gif!
- me: well damnit I should have started this a long time ago!
- [just now]
- jonesy: haha you are not supposed to smile for this!
- me: whatever!
- jonesy: it is supposed to be a conceptual art thing
- jonesy: not like a creeper thing!
- me: oh hey now here is a reason for me to work out! and tan!
- me: pool party in July for a local (gay) city councilman's campaign
- me: surely the who's who of the wealthy older gays of cincinnati will be there
- jonesy: ugh
- jonesy: looking for an A-list sugar daddy?
- me: sugar daddy central!!
- [later]
- me: I wonder if a mustache would look weird with a hairless chest?
- jonesy: lul
- me: maybe I'd have to shave the mustache for this?
- jonesy: reese rideout did it!
- me: is that a porn star?
- jonesy: though he has actual muscles
- jonesy: candy necklace?
- jonesy: you may as well run around with a penis shaped lollipop and booty shorts
- me: who says I don't already!!??!?!
- me: drat all my glue is in studio!
- jonesy: what will you sniff now!?
- me: however shall I attach this nose to make this domino mask more complete?!
- jonesy: oh
- jonesy: wait like a rubber fake nose?
- me: no like a little folded cardboard thing to bridge the nose, to make the domino mask from the Jack of Hearts incident more awesome. I'll then paint over the heart and J to make a classy "criminal" mask for tomorrow's "smooth criminal" soiree
- jonesy: ugh michael jackson
- me: well I think the theme is broader than just MJ
- me: or else I should only paint over the heart and put an M there instead!
- jonesy: but that is the name of that famous Michael Jackson super irritating pop song
- me: well I don't have a white suit and hat so...
- [and then Jonesy didn't say something witty to suitably end this convo]
- [edit]
- jonesy: really? you are criticizing me for not framing the convo for your blog consumption
- me: YES
- jonesy: you're not helping the argument of you not being a self-absorbed lightweight
- me: there it is!
- jonesy: jonesy delivers!
- jonesy: yes, get muscles!
- me: but thats haaarrrrrdddd
- jonesy: you're telling me not everyone has vast natural reserves of simmering rage to motivate them like I do?
- me: correct
- jonesy: just ridiculous
- me: I don't have motivation like that. The longest I've done the situps and pushups routine is like 4 days straight.
- jonesy: it really helps to go to a fully equipped gym and keeping going until it becomes automatic
- me: why can't they invent Captain-America-ization? It was supposed to be done by World War 2!
- me: instead they put their money into atomic bombs... and look where that got us!
- jonesy: that is called "steroids"
- me: no cause steroids you still have to work out!
- me: CA-ization is just, put you in this metal shell for, idk, 5 minutes... ta-da!
- jonesy: I mean if there was a magic muscle box to make you muscley, everyone would be muscley
- me: no it only works if you are already super-skinny and weak! like the guy at the beginning of the movie! and me!
- me: should I wear these "architect" glasses always?
- jonesy: do you want to live as a drag version of yourself always?
- me: so is prostitution something you call the police about?
- jonesy: if you get the pimp's license plate number mebbe
- me: oh that makes more sense than me thinking it was one john dropping her off to another
- jonesy: thats not how that works
- me: in retrospect, yes.
- jonesy: how naive! how sheltered!
- me: bitch which one of us has seen prostitution happen!
- jonesy: sex workers arent exactly self-employed entrepreneurs that pull themselves up by their bootstraps
- me: she was wearing boots though!
- jonesy: derp, if she were a self employed person she would have gotten into her own car after.
- me: again, I thought it was john to john!
- jonesy: they are clients, not monkeybars
- jonesy: tell him you are also interested and to dump that guy?
- me: I guess so
- jonesy: and know, secretly, that when the next piece of ass comes along he will dump you too?
- jonesy: thats how the game works
- me: I suppose I should have moved quicker. That time I went to Chipotle and he was there [a full month ago], he did say that I should ask him out sometime
- jonesy: oh how obvious can you get
- me: in retrospect, I should have seen the hint.
- jonesy: is he too manly for you yet: http://dlisted.com/node/41194
- me: heh
- jonesy: answer: yes
- me: no still good, but I think we've discussed already, his face-puffining
- jonesy: you mean looking more like a man's face and less like a fairy manga princess?
- me: yes precisely
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