February 2012
The time I spend every morning attempting to find two matching black socks likely adds up. And I realized, I’m an “adult” or whatever, I could just go and buy 10 pairs of identical socks, donate all the old ones, and be guaranteed matching socks from there on. But I haven’t. ~~ I’m not a boy, not yet a man~~
Damnit I just realized that I actually have time most days to like, go to a gym or whatever. My primary excuse of not-enough-time is invalid.
Guh.
There is apparently a free Lana del Rey concert this Thursday in the Haight. The last time I went to a free concert, I ended up in OK Go’s hotel room. Will I go 2 for 2??
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The guy in front of me at the burrito place just told me that I have beautiful eyes.
I sometimes find weekends a little depressing. There are so many hours to fill, and whenever I find myself without activities or friends to fill the days with, I feel very lonely and pointless.
It almost makes me look forward to Monday and work; at least there I have a purpose, perhaps even have a feeling of accomplishment.
upwardsandonwards asked: you are hysterical, and your blog is amazing. please explain why you don't have thousands of followers.
Someone posted a picture on facebook of an owl, with the caption “happy superb owl day!” and I’m finding it way funnier than I really should.
There is a tourism ad for Seattle I saw that boasted “35 celebrity chef restaurants.”. They must have a more liberal definition of “celebrity” than I us.
Allow me to list celebrity chefs, not even limiting myself to Seattle:
-Emeril
-Butter diabetes lady
-The douche with the spiked bleached hair
-The accent guy who is on before Fringe
(end of list)
“I was so drunk last night I broke my spaceship.” - things only I have said ever.
January 2012
One of my roommates is a great guy, but him getting home is like a bomb going off. Doors slamming, dramatic yawns, pots and pans, his voice is just loud… It’s the dramatic yawns that really get me though. It’s just so silly. What a day he must have had!
Ugh ordering a pizza is a commitment. A commitment to staying awake until it arrives. I wasn’t ready for this!
Bad news everyone, my phone number does not occur in the first 200 million digits of pi. Looks like i can’t tell someone my number by specifying a start digit… yet.
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Why does an iTunes search of my library for “oz” bring up “Stop! In the name of love” twice? (both Supremes and Glee versions!)
Update: instead of getting up at 10pm and going back up, I woke up at 2am. As yet to be determined if this was the best/worst.
This 9-10pm nap may be the best/worst idea I’ve ever had.
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Oh I guess they are called corkscrews? STILL MISSING THOUGH
And someone swiped the wine bottle opener!!!
My torrents aren’t working for 30 Rock (x2!) or Parks and Rec, and it might as well be the end of the world.
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What I find most interesting about this year’s Oscar nominations is that people are interested in them.
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When you have to specify “BC” and “AD” when describing your work.
Also I went to a new more expensive place specifically to force myself to get something different, but instead spent $38 dollars on what I used to get at Great Clips for $15.
Every time I get a haircut, I intend to say “hey why not something different? What do you think? You know more about this than me.” but instead say “4 on top, 2 on sides.”
It seems that female housemate’s boyfriend is staying here indefinitely while he looks for a place in town. I learned this by overhearing it the day after his unannounced arrival.
He’s an ok dude and all, but this is a pretty small place for 4, let alone 5, people, and when he is here the couple don’t seem to leave the apartment all that much. Go out and explore or something!...
How many Words With Friends games should a person be playing at once? Is it twelve? I think it’s twelve.
Me: Oh and I got a new LEGO set; it's Superman and Wonderwoman verses Lex Luthor!
Him: Were you playing with it just before I got here?
Me: .... no?
Him: It really looks like you just were.
Me: .... :-D
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Ron: Also, we're canceling all of your ongoing projects.
John: What? What about the Pawnee River Dam?
Ron: The dam's dead. Have a nice day.
John: Where will all the water go?
Ron: Wherever it's headed now.
1. I gave up too soon; last night I watched Were The World Mine cuddled up next to someone special.
2. I have business cards now. I am legit.
Oh P.S. last weekend I was being all lonely and sad for no good reason other than I was sick. Things are in fact going super great!
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Saturday night, my friend MYZ invited me to a fancy party. I had to decline because I had a cold and no ID.
That night, he ran into Mark Zuckerberg.
In an alternate reality, I have met Mark Zuckerberg. I cannot say which is the better world.
I am building this Superman LEGO set I got for Christmas, and as I was putting these translucent green parts on the back of Lex Luthor’s mech, I said aloud, “Uh-oh. I have a sinking feeling that this robot is Kryptonite-powered.”
As if I am concerned for Superman’s well being.
jawncharles:
omg u guyz, i think i have a date this weekend and i’m planning on not hooking up with him on our first date.
did u know that’s a thing tho? like going out to dinner and watching a movie instead of blowing each other on the first date? we’ll c how that goes, keep me in ur prayers~
John has reached perfection.
They didn’t even card me.
Someone just called about a different Ohio ID found on 18th street. Huh.
It is [painful/ frustrating/ depressing/ sad/ disappointing/ inconvenient] when things don’t follow the script.
You Americans sure are in for a treat once Sherlock airs stateside.
Potential Blog Gimmicks
1. Acting like I’m from the future but got stuck here in the past, saying things like “man I can’t believe you guys haven’t cured the common cold yet. It sucks having to do this whole vitamin C and bedrest thing.”
2. “Pretending” that when I talked to the ghost he actually responded and now I have a ghost roommate and we hang out. I’d “make...
This movie is my boyfriend now.
Well I’ve given up my romantic idea of watching my DVD of Were the World Mine for the first time cuddled up next to someone special, and instead watch it with this box of kleenex and a plastic bag to put the snotty ones in.
So close! My passport is 3.5 miles away but it’s in a crate which won’t be opened until Monday. Plus, I’d need ID to pick it up but my ID is in the package so…
Posting those signs (6 in total) up in the .1 mile stretch of sidewalk my wallet could have gone away in has really brightened my mood.
I apologize for whining earlier. I can make the most of this weekend. I can be PROACTIVE.
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I can’t go out. I don’t have ID. It’s a four day weekend and I can’t go out. I feel like searching my room again, even though there is no possibility it is in here. And I think D and I aren’t a thing at all anymore. My friends will want to be going to bars/clubs tonight. I can’t go. I’m seriously bummed out by this whole thing. And the lady at the DMV was...
It is, apparently, easier to get a passport than a California ID.
After waiting in line for hour+, I learn that I need my actual passport. Welp. Let’s see if I can get a new debit card without ID!
It was the best of times, it was the blurst of times.